Heartsick Momma

Oh dear - what is it that makes us so emotional as women? God created us to be tender caring creatures. He knew that as children we would need to be nurtured and reared. He knew that as children we would need love. So God created women, moms specifically, to be that compliment to the man's rough and tumble character. Moms listen to our hurts, bandage our bumps, and hurt long after the pain is gone.

This is a piece of wisdom that my mother shared with me long ago to try and explain why she was so upset at some of the things that happened in my life. Long after my issue amd hurt was long forgotten - after I had moved on, my mother still held the hurt for me - whatever the issue was. I am kind of realizing this situation now. Over a blanket.

This weekend when we went to visit Jeremy's granddad we stayed in a hotel. Now both of my boys have their special lovies that they sleep with. Monkeyman has his blankie that he had from infancy, and Chopsy carries R.U. Blankie is a pale yellow waffle blanket with a duck on one corner. It has a thin silky edge that Monkey loves to wrap around his fingers and rub back and forth to help put him to sleep, and R. U. is a froggy. This weekend in the rush to gather everything up and pack the car one of the lovies went missing. We had traveled all the way back - only 5 miles from home, when something was mentioned about blankie. I suddenly thought - "I don't remember packing blankie." A feeling of utter dread washed over me. I tried to push the thoughts out of my head. As soon as I got home I went through everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, that we took 2 or 3 times to search for this beloved lovie. After not being able to find it I felt sick. A frantic phone call was made to the hotel, just in case it was found in the laundry. No such luck. I cried. I was so heartbroken that Monkeyman wouldn't be able to clutch his blankie just so and rub it like he always does to put himself to sleep. After searching for a good 2 hours, my husband broke the news to the Monkster. The news rolled off his back like it was no big deal. "Okay dad." he said.

Meanwhile, I was still heartbroken. I am still heartbroken. Silly mommy. I am sitting here feeling like I need to cry even now. I was so looking forward to saving that blankie after he had outgrown it, to remember when he was little and blankie used to keep the fears away, comfort him until the drowsy feeling of fuzzines filled his head and he fell off to sleep. I was hoping to hold onto the blankie after my son was too big to hold on to him.

I realize that there is coming a day, in the not too distant future that my boys will leave. It hurts to think of it even now. My job has always been to ready them for that day, to help nurture boys who will grow to be responsible young men. Letting go will be hard. That's what a lovie is for. As my boys outgrow their lovies, this mom plans keep their favorites to hold on to them and just remember.

Chopsy's R.U.


Not "Blankie", but a close second.

NOT SO Wordless Wednesday

We went to the Crisis Pregnancy Center's annual dinner last night. This is their new graphic for the logo. I thought it pretty powerful. Wow - so was the speaker at the dinner. So were the stories from the clients. Our God is awesome.... how frequently I forget who HE is and make Him so small, so familiar...Familiarity isn't a bad thing... just when I don't give Him the glory He deserves... I lose the sense of AWE AND WONDER. AMAZING!

Granddad weekend

Last weekend we drove up to the mountains to visit Jeremy's granddad. What a gorgeous ride home we had. The ride up was dark and rainy after we got going - so we didn't see anything, but the ride was definitely challenging. After we got going Chops finally fell asleep about 40 minutes into the ride after not having a nap all day. Jeremy and I looked forward to a bit of quiet and making some time on the road. Monkey fell asleep too. All was quiet until Chops woke up soaking wet through his diaper. He started screaming from being awakened by wet. He soaked through his diaper, his clothes, and into the seat. By this time it had become quite cooler outside so his teeth were chattering while I was trying to change him out of the mess that had been made. Chopsy's screaming awakened Monkey who was not too happy about being roused out of sleep. Needless to say, the ride was anything BUT quiet after that.

The weekend was fun even though it rained most of the day Saturday. The boys had a chance to get outside, even in the rain, to get some fresh air and exercise. We looked at leaves, and the boys found a little bridge to occupy their time for a little while. Chops even fell into the ditch that the bridge crossed over... thankfully, the water level has been low this year which meant Chopsy stayed dry.


It was great to see Granddad, Mom's sister and brother. Jeremy's brother, Daniel, and even Nathan showed up. Nathan had a marathon that he was running with his new father-in-law and drove 2 hours just to come see us for a few hours before heading back to get some sleep before having to be up at 4 am to sign in to run 26.2 miles. What's up with that?

All in all the boys had great fun. After going to church on Sunday morning, we all had Sunday dinner, took another quick walk outside to enjoy the beautiful day, and then packed up the car and headed home.





The ride home was much more quiet. Ahhh! Sleeping boys.

What a Grampa

What a great time we had with Grampa T. He finally left to go back home on Wednesady morning. Before the sun came up he was gone, but oh what fun we had while he was here. Every night Chops asked for Grampa to do fish mask with him. Grampa T held Chopsy while Chops sat on his lap.

Monkeyman asked his Grampa T to sleep on his top bunkbed with him. Grampa T had to decline because as the Monkster put it "it's kind of a mess". He settled for Grampa reading him a story and putting him to bed.

It was great to see my dad interacting with my boys. The boys LOVED it. Every time we were going home from the sitter all I heard was "Grampa T" " Grampa T". What a treat it was to have him here! We can't wait for you to come back Grampa T. Come back soon. Don't stay away so long next time.

Happy Birthday Chopsy!

Has it been two years already? I can't believe it. You've grown so much and gotten so big. I guess it's only a glimpse of what's to come.

Happy Birthday Chopsy! We love you so much! We love your sense of humor, and the way that there are almost no obstacles for you (sometimes to our dismay). We love the way you are so independent and you always want to "try!" You are growing up so fast. We can't wait to see what Jesus has in store for you in the future. Happy Birthday 2 - you!

What the North Wind Brought with it

On Friday we experienced a cold front. Thursday it was a record 87 degrees and then Friday the bottom dropped out by 25 degrees. The high for Friday was 66 and dropping. Brrr! We were ready for it though, welcoming the even cooler temperatures to make it really feel like fall.

With the North wind that brought the cool breeze, rain, and clouds it also brought a visitor. My dad showed up on my doorstep to celebrate Chopsy's birthday with us. It had been discussed earlier in the fall, but due to technical difficulties we weren't sure if he was going to come. Dad showed up on Friday night at about 10 pm from driving all day. Barring a harrowing encounter with a hot air balloon Dad arrived safe and sound.

Since then, we've been celebrating. Chopsy's small birthday party included Gramma Cia and Bepaw Jerry, and Grampa T. Unfortunately, Gramma Hio couldn't attend due to other engagements at the zoo. Both boys have really enjoyed having Grampa T around. He has been the highlight of the weekend.

Thanks for coming Grampa T. We wish you would blow in more often. Whenever the North wind blows we'll be looking and hoping that you're on your way. We love you.

Wordless Wednesday

Moving On???

Tonight I read the blog of my best friend. She's probably the only one who ever reads this. There are only a few invited to read. But I know that she reads faithfully.

After I read her blog I asked my hubby if we could move... to where she lives. He said "no". Then I had a brilliant idea. I told him that we could sell our house, buy the neighbor's RV that they are trying to sell and drive it up north to park it in my best friend's yard. I love her that much. He said "no".

The fact is there are so many places I would love to relocate, however, every place I'd want to go is not for a job, or the activities that happen there. It is for the people who dwell there. I'd move to Ohio, C-ville, Northern VA, Western VA, and maybe Pittsburgh - only cuz another friend just moved there, otherwise - I don't like Pittsburgh.

For now, God's plan is for us to stay here in our house, with our yard, and our jobs, and our church, and our family down here. But don't be surprised if in my prayers I'm requesting that God bring a new adventure to our family.... to move closer to the ones I love and miss so dearly. It's just not worth it without them. I love you.

The blur in my lens

I mentioned a few posts ago that I felt bad because I have so many pics of Chopsy and not many of the Monkeyman. This should explain it. Every time I take my camera anywhere, he is in constant motion. I try to get him to stop for a pose and he runs away. I guess it's what four and a half year olds do before the "I need to be in every picture" stage of later childhood. When I say he is in constant motion, I mean HE IS IN CONSTANT MOTION! I've thought about signing him up for track already. Wherever he goes, he runs.

He actually stopped for a few of these pictures, just because I told him that I'd put them on the computer. Tonight we continued our Sunday night park tour, to a different venue, but fun, all the same. The boys played hard, ran hard, and are now sleeping hard (hopefully).


















These pictures explain the actions of a silly boy who decided to stand under the water fountain that was over shooting the drain. He decided to stand under the trajectory of the water and sing "It's Raining, It's Pouring" while the drops soaked his head and shirt. I didn't think he meant to do it, at first, then hubby told me that he was singing. What am I going to do with him??? :)







The boys and dad are giving a perfect photo op.
















An adorable pose of the two boys actually loving each other... I had to get it while I could.









And of course, Chops, always ready with "Cheese!"

Wordless Wednesday

Foot lotion, markers, and crayons! Oh My!

I've been feeling a little guilty lately that so many of my posts have been about the Chops. However, at this point in time he is the one doing things most ridiculous. Everything, and I mean everything, goes in this child's mouth. He is constantly putting things in his mouth. When he was just 14 months old and really getting the hang of walking without being wobbly we took him to the park with a huge hill and many geese. Where there are geese there is goose poop. While the rest of the family was far beyond us, Chops was hanging back. Being the good mother that I am I monitored him from about 30 feet away making sure he didn't tumble down the hill, yet giving him space to be independent and allowing him to make a few mistakes - how we learn. Unfortunately, he stopped found something to put in his mouth, it was goose poop. UGH!!! I did everything except squirt hand sanitizer in his mouth.

Earlier this week it was marker tips and crayons while we were drawing pictures for a friend while waiting for dinner to be ready. Today it was foot lotion in my night stand drawer.

Last week (and regularly, for that matter) it was dog food from Shiloh's bowl. It's a lucky thing that the dog is so good natured. I guess he figures it's just fair... he picks the prime spot - under Chopsy during dinner.

Ninkle

My Chopsy is growing so fast. He's almost two. Already he is beginning to talk about using the bathroom. He is eager to flush and tells us when he has a poopy diaper, however, over 75% of the time he is wrong. At least he knows that when he tells us that we will definitely check.

Our most recent breakthrough is during tubby time. With 100% accuracy (that's the teacher in me speaking) he will tell me that he needs to "Ninkle, Mommy! Ninkle!" So I tell him to hold on. I get a small bucket that we usually use to rinse his head off , and have since put in the dishwasher. He stands up and tinkles in the bucket. So proud of himself. We are so proud of him. Now the trick is to get him to do it in the potty. We've tried holding a cup in front of him as he is standing to simulate the same action in the tub. No such luck. I guess it will just have to be on his terms.

A day at the park

We've started a Sunday night tradition since school started. After naps we pack up and head out to a park. Tonight was great except that the park we chose had fairground rides invade. We explained to the boys that we were there to play at the park and not on the rides. Monkey had a hard time breathing due to his asthma and the weather change. Luckily, we took the inhaler with us. After running around for about 10 minutes he was having trouble.

We left the playground equipment and decided to slow down and climb the stairs slowly and walk around the perimeter of the park, which also has a running path of about 1 1/2 miles. We took a nice leisurely walk around the park. It was a beautiful evening with just the right breeze. We stopped once or twice to play on some equipment and to pet a passing puppy. He was the cutest little thing... a cross between a beagle and a boxer. He was so sweet. Chopsy was completely in love with him.

We caught a gorgeous sunset and then headed home for a quick dinner, baths, and bed.

What a fun tradition! We are going to keep it up as long as the weather allows.

Wordless Wednesday